Tuesday, June 24, 2008

who am i and what have i done with myself?

First, I must apologize. I have been a bad, bad blogger. I have some cool posts coming as I get caught up, but in the meantime I am giving myself a time-out for not throwing tidbits of life onto the webosphere for my blog friends to snack on.

Speaking of snacks...

I've done lots of crazy diets over the years: the no carbs diet (horrible), the college anxiety diet (effective, but dangerous), and there was that year in high school where all I ate was those Oscar-Meyer CHEESE-FILLED hot dogs. No bun or condiments, mind you, just the cold, processed meat stick. Ew. The cheese inside just made it look like the hot
dog had some hideous disease.

I'm proud to say that I think I'm beyond ever doing "diets". They don't work. I'm all about positive, GRADUAL lifestyle changes. This is why I was drawn to the book "Quantum Wellness" by Kathy Freston. She's all about the mind, body, spirit thing. She also talks about working toward healthier eating/living at your own pace. Undergoing a 21-day cleanse is recommended. This means none of the following:
  • sugar
  • alcohol
  • caffeine
  • gluten
  • animal products
I eased into it by eliminating caffeine and alcohol 4 days ago. Alcohol is no problem, other than a mild urge to sit on the porch in the evening with a little glass of red wine. Caffeine on the other hand! I've had headaches since I stopped, which is a blatant clue that perhaps I was consuming enough for myself, 2 night-shift truckers, and 30 Wall Street Stock Brokers.

Yesterday, I started the food portion of the cleanse. Now is where I ask you to be proud of me for the fact that I have had NO CHEESE for 2 days, and not a single person (or animal) has been harmed. I have to admit that in the past, I have "drunk dialed" once or twice. Nothing mean or regretful...usually just loud, slurred 80s power ballads on some unfortunate friend's machine. I may begin to "cheese dial" soon. I have NO idea what this will sound like or entail. If I have your number, just be on guard.

I must admit, I already feel different. I have tons of energy! Matt thought I was bad before when I'd get all Stepford and spend 4 hours organizing the linen closet. I'm sure this will be much worse. I may have to take up ultimate fighting to harness some of this new uber-liveliness.

The only negative thing I've noticed so far is a digestive issue. How do I put this? I am typically a precision machine when it comes to the whole "food-in, food-out" process. Well, the machine seems to be slacking off on the "food-out" process, despite the fact that I continue to shovel food in. Sorry to readers who didn't want to know such things about me. Let's just say that my girlfriends probably know more about the workings of my internal organs than they do about my hopes and dreams. So these things are not taboo for me. I'm sure a little CHEESE would fix the problem.

I'm not saying that I'll give these things up for good, but I'm just trying to see what happens during the 21 days, and I'll make some choices from there.

So, here's a photo of some of the stuff I'm eating. Apparently food comes in different colors (other than orange or beige). Who knew? I'm sure my fridge is blinded and very confused.

I'll keep you posted as to how the cleanse is going, and what the body count is after, say, Day 8 of NO CHEESE.


Tommy said...

Way to go, Stacey! I've always admired folks who could do the cleansing thing. I've always told Wendy I could kick coffee/caffeine if they could live without me for a week while I go stay in a hotel or monastery to detox like Miles Davis coming off of heroin.

Yes, aren't non-beige foods awesome! We've been reveling in watermelon, farm-fresh blueberries, peaches, and the like for the past couple of weeks.

My next venture is to give up meat again. The entire 'animal products' thing - I dunno. The cow can survive, but I need his curdled milk for cheesy products. Veggie burgers rock my world, but they've yet to master a soy-based cheese that fools me. I keep wanting to spread them over the Sunday comics and see if they pull the image off a'la Silly Putty circa 1976.

Keep me posted on your process. I would love to find some extra energy from something other than a Starbucks cup!

maryk said...

listen, too much cheese'll make you backed up like a winn dixie on a snow day.
with what you're putting in, everything should be coming out, NO PROB.
must be just a transition time.
with my crazy life these days, i've pretty much given up caffeine (gone back on a little bit), quit smoking, given up alcohol except for like twice a month for a half-beer, BUT here's the kicker---i STARTED eating meat. this baby kraft-triandiflou likes him some meat.

good for you---if you need inspiration, or to be talked off a ledge, call Mark Pekar! you knw mark. seriously, he's a cleansing freak.

Vicki said...

Stacey add watermelon to that picture. Watermelon is a GREAT cleaning out food. Know so many people that do the cleansing thing and they eat watermelon to clean out. Not sure if it is the water in it or what but try eating that. Of course that is all they eat so that might be the difference.

I have cut all caffeine out except my morning coffee. And to think I was in my late 20's before I even started drinking the stuff.

As far as meat... I could do that in a heart beat (ok well all of one week a month because I lose way to much iron and damn a good steak or hamburger I could live on during that time) but when you live with a man that would think he would die without meat at every meal it is impossible to do. Even the comment when his daughter asked him if he had an elephant in his belly did not deter him........

heighlo. said...

ready for your cheese withdrawl call...anytime! Kudos to you and your colon.

And feel free to organize any of my closets if you run out of 'em at your place.

Cathrine said...

I'm impressed :) !

Both by photos and cleanse (couldn't do that - need the protein).

Stephanie said...

Now your blog title is a double entendre... LOL.